Dear family, new, old and dear friends! Just an update from Faith! I'll be walking in UCLA's Lavender Graduation, one of the country's biggest Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual* and Transgender graduations! Saturday, June 18 2005!!! Save the date! I'm also psyched (and terrified) to be planning a Science Fiction/Fantasy Tsunami Fundraiser at UCLA, EnigmaCon 2005!
EnigmaCon 2005 combines academia and fan culture to produce exciting panel discussions, media demos, gaming tournaments, vendors, movies and music, all for TSUNAMI RELIEF! EnigmaCon guests include: Babylon 5 creator J. Michael Straczynski, Battlestar Galactica executive producer, Ronald D. Moore, Star Trek actor Walter Koenig (Chekov), co-creators of the Disney Channel hit Kim Possible, Elfquest creator Wendy Pini, game designers from Sony Playstation’s "God of War", "Neverwinter Nights II" and "World of Warcraft", Reverend Piyananda of the Dharma Vijaya Buddhist Vihara Temple in LA and the musical band Warp 11. REGISTRATION NOW OPEN! http://www.enigmacon.org I'm also super excited to be starting my own business, a educational e-commerce venture, imgoingtocollege.org. I've been working with high school students helping them get into college for nearly 10 years now. I hope my experience plus a large developing market for secondary educational services will allow for good income while I continue to write poetry, screenplays and creative non-fiction. I recently was also awarded poetry.com's "Editor's Choice" award for March 2005. My poem, Slow, will be published in an International Library of Poetry book and read "professionally" and put on a CD called The Sounds of Poetry. Check out some of my poetry at: http://www.geocities.com/thefayth/ownart.html The Warmest Wishes AND Much Love To All! Faith

11 June 2005 @ 10:45 pm ANOTHER DAY, ANOTHER DAY
( My Gram had a stroke! Yes, that's right, the one who's married to my grandfather who ALREADY had a stroke! ). When it rains it pours. I went over to my grandparents on Tues night after seeing the excellent Me and You and Everyone We Know. I had to get the addresses of family for graduation announcements. It was late, like 11pm when I got there and my grandmother was a lil slower, but she always is at that time of the day BUT She HAD written the list of people by the time I got there, so I didn't think it was a big deal. I thought she was bit slow on the conversation re: graduation ceremonies, but I really thought it had to do with her discomfort of sending Lav Grad invites to our family. (shakes head) Whoops. Weds morn she woke up a lil light headed but thought she was coming down with a cold, so she ACCELERATED her schedule so that she could get in a lot of stuff b4 coming down with a cold. Thurs morn she woke and couldn't walk without assistance or raise her head off the bed really. Every time she did she was dizzy. After tons of tests that all weren't an MRI, she FINALLY got an MRI so they could see that she did have a stroke that affected her cerebellum and dealt her a loss of equilibrium. The doctors say that the aspirin she was taking every day prolly saved her life or at least a lot of her mobility, so thank GODDESS for that! She was in the hospital till today, and as my mom's up in SLO and my brother had finals, I was over there non-stop from thurs on. She really didn't want my grandfather to be alone with the caregiver (in case of an emergency, it's hard for the 24 hr caregiver to lift my grandfather) so I spent the night at their place. I got to talk to an umpteenth number of family, friends and neighbors who all said the same thing…PLEASE TELL HER TO STOP, TELL HER TO SLOW DOWN, TELL HER TO STOP TAKING CARE OF EVERYONE BUT HERSELF. And I look at them, and smile and say OK, we will, She has to, I'll let her know. I tell my grandmother of her well wishes. I tell her that everyone says the same thing, how much they love her and hope she'll slow down and stop doing so much. She looks at me, questioningly. "Stop, what?" I don't burst into laughter, but the threat is imminent. I realize that she's got no idea of how to slow down more than she has. She doesn't know how to not be involved, right now she's on 3 committees for different things, plans on going to Sacramento to see the Govn’r with teacher's demands, and has a conference in August that she's helping plan logistics for. Not to mention her younger brother who she's guardian for (he's in an mental health home, schizophrenia = big in my family), the husband she's got being cared for at home after his stroke and amputation (he can't talk, except for simple yes and no's and only has slight movement in his arm), her crazy daughter (my mom), and her crazy daughters kids (me and my siblings, my grandmother has been a parent in many regards, e.g. my mom has never paid for anything related to college till she paid for my grad announcements this year). Obviously, I haven't helped by being in college for nearly a decade. With my family, as with many other large families, responsibilities to family takes first place. After God, of course. My mom thumbed her nose at this rule, living the life of the family rebel…which really meant that she worked her ass of to provide for her unemployed husband and 4 children allthewhile being abused and abusing…a.k.a. the short story. I've tried to maintain my independence and freedom to be who I am, at the same time still being there. I know that I would have moved from LA if my grandparents weren't here. I also know that they are the only ones in my life that have been there consistently. My dad was long gone when I was born, didn't meet him till I was 13, my stepdad still battles some part of sociopathy, and my mom only now seems to be recovering from the last 25 years she spent with him.
So anyways when something happens to my grandparents, it's not one of those things that my parents handle like in other families…my mom did come down on Friday and my uncle in VA has been calling, but for the most part Danny and I fit the part of first to know and handle. Of course, neither of us was prone to ALWAYS answering my grandmother's calls (we usually speak to her every day or at least 4 or 5 times a week) on the first ring, so our family's really lucky that we do have so many close friends of the family and extended family. I'll be answering all my phones now tho. Anyways, I'm still hellsa tired, but I'm glad to say my grandmother seems to be improving tho she'll prolly be on a walker for my grad ceremony. Thanks to all who sent me warm wishes after hearing via my AIM away message or by word of mouth. I was really freaked out, at the possibility of losing both my grandparents (it's pretty much well understood that my grandfather's only lingering for her…or maybe for their 50 year anniversary later this year). The freakout helped me understand some important things about giving of yourself, friendship, and what it's all worth. But more on that another day, k?