My sister's graduation was wonderful, it was the first major life event that my family has had drama free in 25 years. Pretty sad huh? and I'm still waiting for the other shoe to drop kinda…hopefully it'll be a gentle thud or even a softshoe. I'm horribly tired after a night in my old bed and room; I’ve missed my home in all it's glorious mess and madness. The greatest thing was seeing my old best friends. In the past I’ve had a slash and burn approach to relationships, if it didn't work or something happened I burned the bridge and moved on. Sometimes I just swam away leaving the bridge to sink into the sea if you will. I felt horribly guilty to find out that my best friends from high school had gotten married, had kids, been to Iraq and I was totally unaware of their life changes.
On the other hand seeing as how the person I was in SLO is so radically different from my me of today, seems I needed that change of location to even be on my way to free. SLO's cute and nice and good weathered but sitting at my sister's graduation with 1000 or so people and a total of 20 blacks (most of which I'd know from childhood) took me back to some of the reasons I was so happy to leave. The graduation ceremony was also punctuated with " they may take our lives but never our freedom" which reminded me off the gross patriotism and nationalism of my hometown at the same time making me think that S.L.O.'s been hit hard by the loss of soldiers being such a small town with limited opportunities for all. All the anti-war protesting at UCLA and in big cities makes you forget who's really fighting for what, because it ain't college kids fer certain. I also thought a bit about love and the loves of your life…I've had quite a bit of that being the love addict that I am, but I wonder about what makes the perfect mate. Is it someone you share so much history and common likes that you can not see them for 6 years and start talking to them where your last conversation left off? Grr. I'm not falling again. Won't. Do. It.