Whedon don’t believe you, say internet // So excited was I the very first time // Holding fresh copies of Once More // For a signing of Buffy cast with Joss // Jabba the Hut Whedon with his mouthWhedon don’t believe you, say internet // So excited was I the very first time // Holding fresh copies of Once More // For a signing of Buffy cast with Joss // Jabba the Hut Whedon with his mouth
So excited was I the very first time // Holding fresh copies of Once More // For a signing of Buffy cast with Joss // Jabba the Hut Whedon with his mouth // “Can we talk about how I’m great”So excited was I the very first time // Holding fresh copies of Once More // For a signing of Buffy cast with Joss // Jabba the Hut Whedon with his mouth // “Can we talk about how I’m great”
Holding fresh copies of Once More // For a signing of Buffy cast with Joss // Jabba the Hut Whedon with his mouth // “Can we talk about how I’m great” // Who looked like she wanted to murder himHolding fresh copies of Once More // For a signing of Buffy cast with Joss // Jabba the Hut Whedon with his mouth // “Can we talk about how I’m great” // Who looked like she wanted to murder him
For a signing of Buffy cast with Joss // Jabba the Hut Whedon with his mouth // “Can we talk about how I’m great” // Who looked like she wanted to murder him // And nearly no interest in fans besides theFor a signing of Buffy cast with Joss // Jabba the Hut Whedon with his mouth // “Can we talk about how I’m great” // Who looked like she wanted to murder him // And nearly no interest in fans besides the
2022-2023
JOSS WHEDON
159 lines8 min listen
Joss, in 5 actsWhedon didn’t do it, he saysWhedon don’t believe you, say internetMeanwhile memory of mine lives a long timeSo excited was I the very first timeWe waited for hours outside of Tower RecordsHolding fresh copies of Once MoreWith the greatest feeling, for we were hereFor a signing of Buffy cast with JossOnly when we got in the door, it was aJabba the Hut Whedon with his mouthConstantly agape and non stop“Can we talk about how I’m great”Next to the kid from Pete n PeteWho looked like she wanted to murder himMeanwhile everyone on cast had tight smilesAnd nearly no interest in fans besides theLoveliest Amber Benson ever delighted to be thereSeeing as it was already a troubled scene IBelieved it best to poke the bearSo I asked Joss Whedon right as I droppedMy cd for a sign, “but why isn’t Willow bisexual?Since we know she loved Ozit seemed decent to query the EP himselfAnd Joss smiled wide, and replied,“Because bisexuals clearly don’t exist”Making him someone I thought I'd keep an eye onI remember other cast flinching when I asked thisAnd the folks I got a ride withsure wanted my mouth shutStop bothering Joss etc etcBut seeing on his face such derision kinda made meQuestion all the love I’d had for BuffyAnd made me wonder what else Joss had in storeSo it wasn’t with good intention that I went to Buffy events camera in hand, I thought just maybe I’d be there and be able to prove this guy bad news!Cause people were in love with Joss in LA,and he could do no wrong with the fansbut to crew a different story…“Never had there been an EP more hated”I was told by a fellow who relayed the best storyOf revenge from a Joss crewTurned out the CD I’d had signedhad a bit more of a storySpecifically how an entire production of BuffyTeamed up against Joss so he never won an EmmyEvery year different crew would find a way toEnsure his submission tapes got submitted way lateSo he never got a nom for Once MoreWith a feeling from his crew that they’d be damnedIf they let a real monster win anythingMay they rest easy knowing how muchTheir efforts may have meant to actressesNever having to shell out smiles to pretendEmmy love for a producer who was serially abusiveWhedon said, never in my lifeBut I have seen with my own eyesJoss use physical intimidation against his own staffThat time it was a fundraiser for John KerryAnd I won a bust of The Master in the raffleBut seeing Joss getright in his assistant’s faceTo scream jump and shoutSee him ball up fists likehe was gonna hit the guyAnd the guy,near twice the size of Jossjust coweredBut Faith Cheltenham saidHey Joss!And right on purposeI threw that bust to the groundNo, I guess it didn’t slipAnd it broke like the love I’d had for a monsterNow broke but still worth somethingFor I never spent a dime again on any Joss anythingNot WhedonCon, nor Browncoat gatheringsNor any screening of Dr. Horrible with NPHNot a single cent and folks knew better than toSay Joss Whedon around meExcept the last time, and wasn’t it a perfect end?I was running panels at Comic Con in San DiegoAnd of courseWhedon types showed up after panelHey a program chair of WhedonCon saidWouldn’t you consider sharing some of your experiences as a Black Buffy fan? And thenAlmost immediately this white mandropped the word nigger.And it exploded like it doesanytime Black people are aroundand white folks say it with the full rNah nigga NOT like Morgen Wallenwas doing with his friendNah this full grown white man wanted to say“Come talk at WhedonCon…something something NIGGER” and I was like“don’t say Nigger ever ever”and then some Black security guards right nearwere like what he say?! WHAT HE SAY!?Leaving me to leave him to explainAs I walked away saying mfing Joss Whedon!I’m still #TeamAntiCancel so I forgive you JossAnd your n word dropping uberfansI forgive too your lack of recollection,for I am 1 in a billion when youaverage it out as far as memory.I hope you can say sorry, just sorry.No more attacks on Black folks or women.No more protestations of your zeal for equality.What we wanna see is changeWhere you give women writers creditAnd you say more openly,I could have been differentLots of people who could have done betterI been there myselfnot explaining my own needFor space and privacy,and I have also been accused ofBeing thoughtless, cruel and mean, so bubI believe in our own ability to change.Out of all the Ones who want somethingmore for you, Joss Whedon,I count myself among them.For I think all of the storiesAlso reflect a different time than nowI don’t think you alone should paythe price of time and a new centuryAnd I believe your work also helpedwomen and minorities get to todayYou gave more voice to them shouting at youCountless women writers have more workMany people of color were seen because of you tooSo there isn’t a single way to look at itAnd you’ve got another act or two leftTake an opportunity to make right what is leftApologize personally by note and small giftSay what people want to hear because it’s rightBecause it’s good and that’s what you’ve stood forApologize for letting it get to your head and howIncredibly hard you were on yourselfas well as everyone elseAnd see what happens to help you move on.Just a thoughtAnd one I might take myself up on tooUntil then, Joss Whedon:I know you can do more.And I will hope for great things from youPerhaps another season of Agent ShieldLeading into a proper Marvel film?Lord knows we need a new Avengers poseSo many opportunities still availableBut a world waits for you to saySorry: that’s not how I wanted you to know meGoing thru a divorce, and being entitledSorry to your actors and writers for notBeing the best Joss you could have been thenAnd perhaps a thank you for where you now standHumbled, more wise and certain that the internet doesn’t always get it right and yetMost of us could always be better man#songsinthekeyofx